This entry is the second part of my fabulous week last week in which I got to really spend some time being and understanding whom I really am inside. While I am still coming down from the adventures, I wanted to capture my recollections and emotions as close as they are to help me reflect later.
As the business side of day 2 wound down, I could feel the sweet anticipation of the upcoming night stirring inside of me. Flying back to my room, I hastily showered and dressed before rushing out the door. Tonight was going to be special as I went our and arranged a make-over and photo shoot with a local gal there. This part of the experience I dared myself to do since I am not very confident in my looks and don't really like getting my picture taken because of this. But I've read about how other girls had raved about the experience so I thought it was a good experience to undertake.
Arriving at the studio, it was easily apparent that I was a bundle of nerves. While she did the best to help me relax and chat during makeup, it was a quick shot of tequila that I used to help calm the nerves a bit. Back in the chair, I decided what the heck and had her apply the glam look to my eye shadow and was so impressed with her results. When she was finished, I almost cried away the mascara at the fabulous job she did and could hardly believe how pretty I felt. Then it was time to take some photos. That was another experience that I needed to warm up to but after seeing some of the results in the viewer I could hardly believe it was me. It is so hard to put in words how it felt to look at oneself and feel happy and beautiful and god I could have posed all night for her. I am not sure how she felt about all my hugs and thank yous but it has been so long since I felt this way I could hardly stop myself from gushing.
After the shoot, I decided there was no reason to waste this look and decided to head out to a local gay bar by myself. This was another first and it felt great walking into the bar. Old Jaclyn that would never have left the house would have died at my brazen actions. While it was a slow weeknight at the bar, I was hit upon by three different guys and it was intoxicating to gather so much attention. I was really getting into everything when the one guy sitting next to me told me that he found me rather attractive as a man in a dress. That popped the bubble as I looked at him and just said thank you as I felt crushed inside. I am not sure what I wanted him to say, but I guess somehow I just wanted to be considered a woman although I know that is a far stretch for me. Perhaps I am just being way to sensitive, but I left the bar alone a few minutes later and took my experiences back home with me.
Overall it was a very good night and I came away feeling happy that I went out and experienced it. Below are a few photos from the trip that still make me feel good inside.